Broken Vow

Have you ever loved someone wholly and wholeheartedly and hoped that you could spend the rest of your life with him, but only to find out in the end that it could never be because he broke your trust? You were aware of his past but he told you he has changed. You trusted him because you saw he did – for a time...until you’re starting to believe he could never change. I wanted to prove that ‘once a player is always a player’ doesn’t apply to every once-a-player-turned–straight. I refused to give up then, and may be there’s still this part of me that refuses to do so. Just a tiny-weenie bit of hope left.

For me, it’s very important that I could trust the man I would be with for the rest of my life. I really thought I could, but now I’m not so sure. I’m confused, mad, disappointed, annoyed, and most of all I feel betrayed. A vow has been broken. I’m not so sure if I could trust him again. How can you trust a man who tells you he loves you very much, yet he ‘plays’ with someone else behind your back? He tells you it was just nothing, that they were just friends? How lame can that excuse get?

The thing is, unlike the woman in the song who didn’t know the ‘other one,’ I know her...I sometimes see her. And I trusted him when he said they knew each other before and they were friends. Then, you catcha portion of a text conversation which tells you that something is going on. Yes, it hurts. It hurts very much. I need to give myself some time to think about this. The question that keeps on playing in the mind right now is, “can I ever trust him again?’